I’ve been processing through lots of emotions over the last 9 months since being laid off. I’ve met with several friends, pastors, counselors, etc. I’ve been going through all the stages of grief, hurt, pain and anger.
In meeting with my counselor last week, he said that God allowed this to happen and I needed to try to discern what He’s up to in my life. What is He wanting to change in me? Well, yesterday I had coffee with a new church planter in my city and he had been through a similar painful experience years ago. He said that my love for ministry needed to die so that my love for God could take front and center.
His words immediately resonated with my spirit. I have a great love of ministry and pastoring, but sometimes that overshadows my daily love of God and time with Him. I can spend more time helping others (pastoring), than feeding my soul and spending quality time with Christ.
I remember attending a Catalyst OneDay two years ago and hearing Craig Groeschel say, “We have too many full-time pastors and part-time disciples.” Gulp! That hit me right between the eyes. I don’t know who I’m talking to, but maybe some of you need to die to the ministry and fall in love with God all over again. Pray for me as I journey on.