Why Churches Shouldn’t Be Meeting In-Person During COVID

Hi. I’m Greg Atkinson. If you’re new here: WELCOME! I’ve been blogging since 2003. If you don’t follow and keep up with me on Facebook and YouTube, you may not know that I’m working with a new writing agent on a big new book and have been busy prepping for that. I’m taking the whole month to write and focus on this book proposal that my agent will be pitching to major publishers. Pray for me, please.

In my brainstorming session with a pastor friend last night, I told him what I really think of churches meeting during the time of COVID and what it means to love our neighbor and wear masks. He agreed and it was a great discussion because it was a place of safety. Allow me to share with you what I shared with him in a “safe place.”

I asked him to pray for me as I’ve been thinking about blogging and writing an article to help church leaders think through this. We’ve got to realize that Covid/the pandemic is worse NOW than it was in March and April when we canceled services.

I told him that in 2020 (during a pandemic) Elevation Church saw over 9300 decisions for Christ! Saddleback Church saw over 16,000 decisions for Christ! That’s 80 a day. And Mike Todd and Transformation Church in Tulsa saw over 22,000 decisions for Christ!

Friends, you’re not being persecuted. You’re not being discriminated against. Your church isn’t being attacked by the government or the CDC. This IS NOT about your rights. But you say, “The church is essential.” Sure. So go to church online. But you say, “Studies show that people are healthier that go to church every week.” Sure. I’m the healthiest I’ve ever been. I go to church online every week since March 8th, 2020.

As I said on my third podcast with Carey Nieuwhof, the Gospel has never been proclaimed so broadly, so loudly, and so boldly as in the time of Covid. If you’re wondering what Paul (who wrote letters and became all things to all men) and Jesus (who took a boat out on the water to speak to a crowd because it amplified his voice) would have done – they would have used technology. God gave us this technology.

 

Friends, I’ve been blogging about church online since 2008. That’s right: 2008. For 13 years, I’ve been begging churches to use technology and broadcast the Gospel. We have the tools. We have the technology and equipment. There’s no need to gather in-person and put people’s lives at risk and be a negative witness in our community and like SO MANY churches, become a super-spreader and make the news in a negative way. I watched a church in Charlotte get blasted on the news the other night for gathering with a large crowd and spreading Covid.

Why do I write about this all of a sudden today? I guess it’s a tipping point. I had an executive pastor reach out to me last night and say someone that came to their church on Sunday tested positive yesterday for Covid and he wanted my help writing a press release (which I’ve helped several churches with).

Then today: Today, not one, but two different church staff members reached out to me in tears saying that their church is refusing to shut down and is in the midst of a Covid spike in their community. One church just had a Covid outbreak with several people, shut down for one week, and is planning to open back up next week.

Both church staff members asked for my help, my prayers, my advice, and asked me to intervene and talk with their leadership to talk some sense into them and tell them not to meet in-person. I speak with so many church staff members that are on the verge of quitting because they’re putting their lives on the line for bosses that make them show up to work during the highest outbreak of Covid we’ve ever seen, in the biggest outbreak country in the world (the USA). I know other church staff members who did quit earlier this year because their leadership wouldn’t listen to reason.

I encourage you to read Carey’s blog and learn from the shifts that he’s talking about. Listen to my podcast with him about online engagement. Be encouraged by the stories of Elevation and Saddleback and Transformation Church and SO MANY others that are fulfilling the Great Commission and the Great Commandment by not meeting in-person and going online FOR A SEASON.

Lastly, read Rick Warren’s thoughts that he shared recently. I’ll link to his article below. Pastor, this isn’t about your rights and you’re not being targeted. Here are Pastor Rick Warren’s own words:

“U.S. churches,” he said, “have not faced discrimination.” He also said churches should promote the wearing of masks.

“They might have a discrimination case if theaters weren’t closed, football games weren’t closed,” Warren told Relevant. “But they are. We’re not being discriminated against. This is a safety issue.

Regal Cinemas closed down 650 theaters. Disney laid off 28,000 people. We’re not being discriminated against. Some churches are willing to gamble the health of their people. I’m not. The good shepherd prays for his sheep, cares for his sheep. One day I will be responsible. I don’t want to be a super-spreader. I’m not doing this out of fear; I’m doing this out of love. You wear a mask for the love of your neighbors, yourself.”

I’m praying for you pastors and church leaders. I’m here for you. I’ve been writing, blogging, speaking, teaching, consulting, and coaching on the online church for over a decade. I want you to reach people for Christ. I just know for a fact that you can do that through technology. I want you to disciple people. I just know for a fact that you can do that through technology (I’m in a Zoom small group). I want you to love your neighbor and that’s real and tangible and practical now by not putting them in danger and keeping your people safe and not becoming a super-spreader.

Lastly, I was talking with my friend Dave Gibbons yesterday and he lives near LA. My heart hurts over all the hospitals that are overrun and out of beds and out of ICU space and have ice trucks in the parking lot for a morgue. This isn’t political friends. Some in leadership have tried to make it political and partisan and they’ll have to answer for that. This is science and this is about saving lives.
Yes, the US is #1, but not in a good way. We lead the world in Covid cases and deaths and hospitalizations. If the Church would lead the way, we could get this under control. A watching world is watching us and wanting to know if we truly do care for others and if we truly do love our neighbor and our community.
Friends, listen to me: It’s NEVER BEEN ABOUT THE BUILDING. I’m a hospitality guy and even I know that. Take a break for a season. Watch online and trust God. You’ll still see your church grow.
Personally, I gave financially to my home church the most I’ve ever given in my life and I haven’t stepped foot in the door since February. I still worship. I still do discipleship. I still talk with my pastor. I’m still growing in my faith and spiritual journey. You can do it. Just trust God. Trust God to provide for your church financially. Don’t meet in-person simply to collect an offering. I know that sounds harsh, but I heard it directly from a pastor in my Facebook group. God is bigger than that. TRUST GOD.
If we all do our part, we can be a solution to the greatest crisis we’ve ever gone through, and guess what? It will actually help our economy.
I have friends in Australia and New Zealand that used to be under lockdown because they have better leadership and guess what? They don’t have any more new cases of Covid. It’s gone. It’s over and they can go back to their church buildings and they can rebuild their economy.
This isn’t about your 1st Amendment and God forgive those foolish pastors threatening the 2nd Amendment. This is about practically and tangibly loving your neighbor by PUTTING OTHERS FIRST. The first line of Pastor Rick Warren’s bestselling book Purpose Driven Life is “It’s not all about you.”

I have friends in other countries that look at us struggling with Covid and say, “What’s up with Americans and their rights?” We need to live out the Gospel and the words of Jesus. We need to put others first. We need to resist being selfish.
The American Church is bleeding right now and yes, we are in desperate need of a revival, but it won’t come through any political leader. It will come through worship and sacrifice and honoring others above ourselves and when the world sees that: WATCH OUT!
I’m praying for you and I’m stepping down off my soapbox and praying I still have some friends left after this. 😅 I love you.

Here’s Pastor’s Rick article that I referenced: https://www.christianheadlines.com/contributors/michael-foust/rick-warren-most-us-christians-have-a-political-worldview-not-a-biblical-worldview.html

FREE COVID-19 Christmas Resources

Hi. I hope you’re doing well. I’m not going to lie to you. COVID-19 is on the rise and is the highest it’s ever been. This Christmas is going to be the most unique Christmas we’ve ever experienced.

Some churches have canceled in-person services and gone back online-only (I, personally, think that’s the right call). Some are doing a hybrid approach.

We at the First Impressions Conferencealong with one of our speakers, Ben Stapley of Christ Fellowship Miami, have put together a FREE COVID Christmas Resource Kit for you to help you and your team prepare for what’s sure to be the most unprecedented Christmas we’ve ever experienced as the Big “C” Church.

Go HERE to download your FREE resource. No strings attached. Enjoy!

Thanks and happy holidays!– Greg Atkinson, Founder Worship Impressions & First Impressions Conference

 

 

*** Again: Download your FREE resource list HERE.

The First Impressions Workshop featuring Greg Atkinson

Join First Impressions Conference Founder Greg Atkinson as he teaches you how to lead first impressions in the new normal. Greg discusses the Post-COVID Church and how to welcome guests in the new reality.

Sign up here for access. http://firstimpressionsworkshop.com/

 

First Impressions and Church Guest Experience Podcasts

Hello, friends. I’ve had the honor of being on several podcasts over the years. Recently, I was a guest on some great podcasts where we discussed my books The Hospitality Ministry Handbook for Volunteers and my bestselling book Secrets of a Secret Shopper.  

I realized that I haven’t told you all about them, so I wanted to post them here for you to check out.

I’m in the process of recording several more, so stay tuned for updates.

For now, give these a listen!

Greg Atkinson Launches The Church Secret Shopper Certification

Greg Atkinson is a bestselling author, speaker, pastor, coach, and consultant who has worked with churches of all sizes, including some of the largest and fastest-growing churches in the country, as well as organizations such as Josh McDowell Ministries. Greg is considered an expert in church guest experience, first impressions, hospitality, guest services, and worship.

Greg has produced worship services for three mega-churches, served on Worship & Arts staffs, and been a pastor – serving the local church for the last 26 years. Greg also produced several large conferences including Leadership Network’s Innovation3 Conference, Catalyst Dallas, and the Rebecca St. James’s SHE Conference.

Greg was selected as one of the Top 30 Christian Leaders to follow on Twitter in 2017, 2018, 2019, and 2020. To read the list featuring leaders like Dan Cathy, Andy Stanley, Craig Groeschel, Ravi Zacharias, Bob Goff, Russel Wilson, David Carr, LifeWay, Tim Tebow, Brian Houston, The Gospel Coalition, Dr. Sam Chand, Chris Brown, Frank Bealer, and others – go HERE.

Greg’s blog was also selected as one of the Top 35 Blogs Christian Leaders Need to Read in 2018, 2019, and again in 2020. His blog is listed with ChurchLeaders.com, Pastors.com, Michael Hyatt’s blog, and others. You can read the list HERE.

Greg has spoken at numerous colleges, seminaries, and conferences all over North America, including teaching “Intro to Praise and Worship” at Dallas Theological Seminary from 2005 to 2007. Greg has trained several church staff teams, including full-time staff at Saddleback Church and Prestonwood Baptist Church.

Greg is a contributor to many magazines and websites, including ExPastors.com, Rick Warren’s Ministry Toolbox Newsletter, Pastors.com, ChurchLeaders.com, Outreach Magazine, Relevant Magazine, Christianity Today, Leadership Journal, XPastors.org, Catalyst, FaithVillage.com, Preaching Magazine, ChurchCentral.com and Leadership Network.

You can hear Greg speak on the subject of first impressions on various podcasts here: https://gregatkinson.com/first-impressions-podcasts-greg-atkinson-church-secret-shopper/

Greg started and leads the Weekend Worship and Guest Services Facebook group. Currently, it is a thriving community of 15,000 church leaders from around the world. You can join here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/worshipandguestservices/

Greg also leads the Church Assimilation and Next Steps Facebook group, currently boasting 5000 church leaders.

Greg is a coach and consultant – specializing in areas such as first impressions (also called hospitality or guest services), leadership, and the entire worship experience. Greg is a member of the Forbes Coaching Council and a Forbes featured contributor.

Greg has been a professional secret shopper for several aspects of the hospitality industry, including restaurants, hotels, and various forms of travel.

Greg is the Founder of the First Impressions Conference – the annual event featuring the leading voices for first impressions and guest services from around the world.

Greg is also the Founder of  Worship Impressions – a professional church secret shopper service. Greg has worked hard over the last two decades to build this consulting brand and reputation of a solid ministry to the local church. Greg specializes in church guest experience, first impressions, hospitality, worship, and production.

HERE’S THE BIG NEWS:

For years I have been asked to train leaders to be secret shoppers. I literally wrote the book on it and thought that would be good enough, but over time, the demand for hands-on training and mentoring has increased. So, I’m going to offer a secret shopper certification and train people myself.

If you’d like information, sign-up here: http://secretshopper.church/

NOTE: Like any certification, this will not be cheap. The book is cheap. 😉 If I’m going to invest in you and endorse you, you’re going to have to earn it. I look forward to hearing from you.

Greg Atkinson Knows Church Guest Experience

Someone recently interviewed me and asked me what I do. I thought I would state it plainly here on my blog again. I’m still coaching and consulting – yes, even in this crazy 2020 year.

Greg Atkinson and the team at Worship Impressions specialize in church guest experience. From the basic church secret shopper or mystery worshiper weekend experience to online presence evaluations to coaching and training – we do it all and stand ready to serve you.

I’ve recently partnered with a company and offer all kinds of services including renovation, AVL, signage, platform design, and more.

Greg Atkinson has been considered an expert in church guest experience, guest services, first impressions, hospitality, worship, and overall church leadership. You can read more about him HERE.

Interested in hiring Greg? Contact Greg by filling out the GET STARTED form (found at the top of his business website).

And be sure to check out the fourth all-new: First Impressions Conference featuring a killer lineup of over 100 speakers.

Did you know you can interact with me and nearly 15,000 church leaders from around the world? You can join us at http://guestexperience.church/

Also, we have a brand new group focused on assimilation and helping guests take their next steps. You can join us at https://www.facebook.com/groups/churchassimilation/

10 Questions to Ask Your Congregation Before You Reopen

“When can we reopen our church?” That is the question that keeps getting asked. I want to help you make an informed decision.

Pastor Judah Smith recently said that now is a great time to survey your congregation. We wholeheartedly agree. Our fear is that church leaders and pastors may be assuming things that their people aren’t thinking or on the same page with. 

What if you have a church of 500 people but when you reopen the doors only 100 show up? What if all 500 show up, but your Governor has put social distancing guidelines and maximum occupancy numbers in place?

What if it takes 50 volunteers to pull off a Sunday, but only 10 return? 

What are you going to do about children’s ministry? How will you keep them safe?

Who is going to completely sanitize the church? How will that be communicated to the congregation? 

Will you be adding services? Will you be roping off seats and dividing up sections of the auditorium for seating?

What about the drive-in church? Many churches are talking about starting back outside (drive-in) first before going back inside the church building?

Will you continue to live stream and do all the online church stuff you’ve been doing the past month? 

Will you continue to pass the offering plate? How will you handle giving? Are you adding giving boxes and continuing to encourage online giving?

How will you celebrate Mother’s Day? 

These are things that must be thought through and discussed as church leaders.

Here are some sample questions for your congregational survey to get you thinking. Use whatever works best in your context:

 

  1. When is the soonest you would consider coming back to the church building?
  2. Would you come if we had a drive-in service?
  3. Do you expect the church to provide you a mask?
  4. If you volunteer, are you planning to volunteer in the same spot if we reopen?
  5. If you have kids, will you be putting your kids in children’s ministry?
  6. Do you want the church to serve coffee and refreshments? (If you used to)
  7. When churches resume worship services in their facilities, will you be more likely to attend services in person, or online?
  8. In the last 6 weeks, how many times have you watched services online?
  9. How many times a month do you typically attend church?
  10. Have you ever given online to our church?
  11. Are you comfortable with us passing the offering plate?
  12. Are you comfortable with us serving Communion?
  13. Are you in favor of us rolling out house churches/small groups of 10 people to get back to meeting together physically until it is safe to do so at our full size?

Survey creation and sharing options:

SurveyMonkey.com

Google forms

Gravity form

JotForm

Formstack

Typeform.com

Your church’s ChMS (Example: FaithTeams, Tithely, Rock, Planning Center, CCB, Fellowship One, etc.)

 

SO… When you do decide to open up, here are some great resources like hand sanitizer stations from my friends at Outreach.

 

Articles and resources for consideration as you make these decisions:

 

https://www.whitehouse.gov/openingamerica/

 

https://www.aei.org/research-products/report/national-coronavirus-response-a-road-map-to-reopening/

 

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/church-after-quarantine-5-strategic-questions-help-your-ted-vaughn/

 

https://kenbraddy.com/2020/04/18/20-questions-your-church-should-answer-before-people-return/

 

24 More Questions the Church Should Ask Before People Return

 

https://www.tnbaptist.org/reopen

 

https://www.columbiametro.org/relaunching-your-congregation/

 

https://medium.com/@pastorbrandonweddle/how-to-re-open-your-church-after-covid-19-bd10ad5b2fd6

 

https://www.christianitytoday.com/edstetzer/2020/april/what-relaunching-church-might-look-like-over-next-312-month.html

 

https://www.ministrytogether.com/what-to-do-now-as-we-enter-coronavirus-phase-2/

 

https://www.vanderbloemen.com/reopening-church

 

https://www.vanderbloemen.com/blog/reopening-the-church-after-covid19

 

https://malphursgroup.com/ready-to-reopen-church-checklist/

 

https://www.smartchurchsolutions.com/blog/church-facility-re-opening-checklist

 

https://stateofthechurch.com/churchpulseweekly

 

*** For a free downloadable PDF of this resource along with tons of other resources for the Church and Coronavirus (including free webinars), join the Weekend Worship and Guest Services Facebook group and join the discussion of 13,000 church leaders from around the world sharing resources. You can join for free HERE.

SO… When you do decide to open up, here are some great resources like hand sanitizer stations and face masks from my friends at Outreach.

*** If you’d like a downloadable copy of this resource of top questions to ask to pass out to your leadership team, click HERE.

How Your Church’s Website Homepage Should Look

For well over a decade I’ve evaluated church’s online presence across North America. For over 200 churches, I’ve critiqued their social media and website and given them feedback – all without having to get on an airplane. If you’d like to hire me to evaluate your church’s online presence like I talked about on Carey Nieuwhof’s podcast, go HERE to get more details.

However, many of the things that I looked for and advised are no longer relevant. For example, people don’t need to see a homepage with service times and directions like I’ve always advised. They don’t need to see an “I’m New” or “What to Expect” or “Plan Your Visit” button.

Now, in the midst of the Coronavirus, you should have an overhaul of your church’s homepage.

Here’s what people need to see when they go to your church’s website:

  • Online services (You should have your messages/services playing on your home page).
  • Online small groups
  • Online giving
  • Links to social media (Facebook and YouTube)
  • Daily Devotionals (if you do them)
  • Links to what you’re doing in your community

Here are some great churches for you to get inspiration from:

PRO-TIP: You don’t have to stream your service once a week (Sunday at 11am for example). You can have multiple services play throughout the week. As a matter of fact, you could be delivering online content to your people daily. Set up your service to play on-demand!

BONUS: Also, why not do daily devotionals? Why not use an online connection card like my friends at Vous Church? Get creative.

SPECIAL SHOUT OUT AND RECOGNITION TO MY FRIENDS AT ACCESS CHURCH THAT I CONSULTED WITH: https://couch.church/

I’ve been saying: “Digital = Daily” – Greg Atkinson

 

*** Since I’m grounded and not traveling like I normally do for secret shopper consultations, I can do more of my Package Three (online presence evaluations). I can evaluate your church’s social media, website, and online service. If this is something that interests you, go HERE for more details.

*** Looking to start using a true ChMS/church database with online giving built-in? Have you seen that FaithTeams is offering a FREE 60-day trial due to the Covid virus? Sign-up HERE.

*** My small church plant got up-and-going in minutes with our online giving through Tithe.ly. Here’s my link to them.

 

HAPPY EASTER!

  • Here are some essential and insightful thoughts from my friend Carey Nieuwhof about this first all digital Easter. Check them out HERE.
  • Here are all kinds of FREE Easter resources from Life.Church HERE.

Why Bring Greg Atkinson, the Church Secret Shopper, to Your Church This Year?

Greg Atkinson is the bestselling author of Secrets of a Secret Shopper and The Hospitality Handbook for Volunteers – and is a speaker, coach, and consultant who has worked with churches of all sizes, including some of the largest and fastest-growing churches in the country. Greg has also consulted with numerous businesses and nonprofits, including Josh McDowell Ministries.

Greg has produced worship services for three mega-churches and been a pastor – serving the local church for the last 20-plus years. He has also produced large conferences including Leadership Network’s Conference and Catalyst Dallas.

Greg has a unique ability to see things that you miss due to his “fresh eyes” and experience in knowing what to look for that makes a difference to guests visiting your church.

Whether your church is historic and traditional like Menlo Park Presbyterian in California and First Baptist Dallas, or modern and rocking like New Life Church in Colorado Springs and Bayside Church in Sacramento (where Lincoln Brewster leads worship) – Greg will make sure your church is doing things with excellence and an eye towards hospitality.

Greg is available to come to your church over the weekend this year and give you a detailed and lengthy report of his finding and action items to do to help your church go to the next level. Greg goes over the entire report with your church’s leadership team, takes questions and points you in the right direction. If you’re serious about reaching the unchurched and making your church guest-friendly, contact Greg.

Here’s what some amazing leaders said after hiring Greg to work with their church:

“Greg’s ministry provided a really valuable perspective on our weekend experiences as a church. His heart for the Kingdom and passion to see every church reach its maximum potential is a gift to those of us who care deeply about seeing our churches thrive.” – John Ortberg, Senior Pastor, Menlo Church, Menlo Park, CA

“Greg came into Grace Community Church and gave us a top to bottom look at who we are as a church to the people we are most trying to reach. He is thorough and detailed in his report but tries hard to be helpful, explaining his findings in a context that fits with the church culture. He knows that culture well because he knows churches, people and he does his homework. This is money well spent!” – Ron Edmondson, Former Co-Pastor, Grace Community Church, Clarksville, TN, CEO of Leadership Network

Greg Atkinson is smart, detailed, thorough and saw things that we would never notice.  His feedback was invaluable and we are making several strategic changes as a result of his visit. We will use him again. I encourage to you do the same. In a word – he’s the best.” – Ray Johnston, Senior Pastor, Bayside Church, Sacramento, CA

“Visitors to your church are more often than not people who don’t know Jesus and are looking for an excuse to not come back. Greg’s evaluation of your church helps you dig into where you can significantly improve a guest’s first time experience. He makes you think and leaves no rock unturned.  Probably the best money we’ve spent all year long.” – Ashley Wooldridge, Senior Pastor, Christ’s Church of the Valley, Peoria, AZ

“I highly recommend Greg as a “Secret Shopper” for your church. He helped us see things we had missed and confirmed what we were already working toward. His insight will help your church feel like a home.” – Brady Boyd, Senior Pastor, New Life Church, Colorado Springs, CO

“Greg has a great ability to see and assess ministry detail. His work in many churches brings considerable experience and insight to your staff team. Greg’s church Secret Shopper process offered us a fresh set of eyes to help us take excellence to the next level. Very helpful!”– Dan Reiland, Executive Pastor, 12Stone Church, Lawrenceville, GA

“Greg was able to bring things to our leadership team’s attention in areas that we had missed. His perspective and ideas have helped us develop new strategies to help us grow and reach more people. As we take the ideas for improvement and implement them we look forward to seeing more people come to connect with God, grow and learn to live generously.” – Steve Smothermon Sr., Senior Pastor, Legacy Church, Albuquerque NM

“Greg brought a fresh perspective to our campus and offered a frank assessment of where we were honoring our guests and where we might need improvement. It’s easy for us to miss the obvious when we experience it week in and week out. But Greg knew what to look for and where to find it! His input has shaped a key area of our strategic development.” – Danny Carroll, Senior Pastor, Water of Life Community Church, Fontana, CA

“It is easy to get lost in the day-to-day operations of the church and not see some of the glaring issues you may have in your church. Greg has the unique ability to look at the church from a “first-time guest” perspective and communicate with you that experience. His insights were invaluable.” – Scott Wilson, Lead Pastor, The Oaks Fellowship, Red Oak, Texas

“Greg provided detailed and thorough feedback regarding his experiences before, during, and after his visit to First Baptist Dallas.  He helped confirm some things we already knew or suspected, and brought others to our attention for the first time.  Greg will help you make sure you are doing everything possible to reach as many as possible for Jesus Christ.” – Ben Lovvorn, Executive Pastor of Operations, First Baptist Dallas

“Greg’s approach is thorough and holistic. From the conversations before the visit to the detailed report following, you can tell Greg knows what he is doing and that he cares deeply for the local church.  Our weekend services benefited a great deal from his critical feedback and observations.”– Ted Vaughn, Chief Creative Officer, The Rock Church, San Diego, CA

“You want your church to Thrive? If so, pay attention to the little things. They add up to a big impact! Greg can help your church become more effective in just one visit!” – Dr. John Jackson, Executive Director, Thriving Churches International, Executive Pastor, Bayside Church

“Greg Atkinson helped us look at our weekend services with fresh eyes. His feedback was intelligent, balanced, and helpful.” – Steve Stroope, Lead Pastor, Lake Pointe Church, Rockwall, Texas

To inquire about more information and get the process started, fill out Greg’s brief intake form here.

* Happy New Year!

5 Ways to Improve As an Active Listener

listening-earLet me say up front that this post is longer than usual, but if you read it all and truly wrestle with it, you’ll be a better leader and your family and congregation will thank you for it. Let’s dive in!

Communication is key to being an effective leader and I would argue a genuine human being. After being called out by my wife, previous employers and team members for interrupting, I had to do some deep soul searching and take an introspective look at how I communicate, dialogue and interact with people in general. I realized I didn’t intentionally practice active listening.

Active listening is a communication technique used in counseling, training, and conflict resolution. It requires that the listener fully concentrate, understand, respond and then remember what is being said.

Honestly, this is an area I’ve dealt with for years and am just now actively working on improving. I think I’ve always known that listening is key; I just haven’t done a good job at it in every area of my life.

I actually wrote about leaders needing to listen in my last book Strange Leadership. In the book, I said, “Leaders are readers. Leaders are learners. Leaders are listeners.” I even pinned a TwitPic to my Twitter wall to share it with others. It’s been retweeted over 1200 times. I think we all know this is true deep down. The question is do we live this out? Do I live this out?

I’ve blogged and posted on social media numerous times that I see a counselor or therapist. I have for years and I highly recommend it, especially for pastors. Lately, this is what I have been working on with my therapist. I asked him to help me be a better active listener. So each week we work on active listening.

Here’s what I’m learning and here are five ways to evaluate yourself and do your own introspection:

  1. Leadership: Employers, are you open to feedback? Do you know and practice bottom-up leadership? Do you learn from your employees? When you lead and interact with your team and staff, do you really listen to them? Do you know their dreams, their passions, struggles, and frustrations? Do you hear them when they say their hurting, or tired, or burnt out and in need of rest? Employees, do you understand what your employer wants from you? Do you actively listen when he or she gives you instructions and corrections? Do you get defensive and interrupt them when they critique you or give you a performance evaluation? Pastors and church leaders, are you listening to your congregation? When you plan sermon series, do you have a good pulse on what your people are going through? Do you actively listen to their concerns, fears, and frustrations with where the church or leadership is heading? Do you encourage open dialogue?
  2. Counseling: Pastors, when you counsel people in your congregation, do you cut them off and interject your thoughts and opinions? I have in the past. Do you practice active listening in such a way (like a therapist would) that you can repeat back to them what they said? Good counselors and therapists will listen to you vent and share and then respond with, “So what I hear you saying is…” I know you have a Biblical worldview, a strong grasp of Scripture and theology, but there is much to be learned in this area. My wife is a counselor and they go through a grueling two-year grad school program to learn counseling techniques – techniques we would benefit from learning. A book I highly recommend is entitled Toughest People to Love. I’ve read it twice and found it thoroughly helpful and insightful. I also recommend you reach out to a local therapist and pick their brain. Ask them to teach you how to be a better active listener. And, if you’re not already doing it, make an appointment with a counselor. You will benefit greatly from it. Your family and congregation will benefit because of it, and you might learn something.
  3. Social media: Dave Adamson recently said that at North Point Church they strive to use more questions marks than periods. My friend, Nils Smith said, “Facebook is a social network, which means that conversation is central to the platform and the best way to create a conversation is to ask a question.” The biggest problem I see when I do an online presence evaluation as a church secret shopper is churches using social media as a broadcast tool only. They don’t truly create conversations and safe places for people to react, interact, and dialogue with the church and its leaders. My friend Brandon Cox wrote a helpful and insightful book entitle Rewired. In the book, Brandon writes, “The world around us is having a conversation about life, meaning, culture, and eternity, and we have an amazing opportunity not just to join the conversation but also to lead it. But too many in the church are struggling to keep up with this cultural shift and failing to use these communication tools to their full advantage. And this shift we are seeing toward a more mobile, social environment is actually a return to the form we were created for: to be in relationships, to have conversations, and to share our stories  with each other.” I encourage you to strategically and prayerfully rethink your social media strategy as a church with a focus on listening.
  4. Family: Did you know that if you learn this skill of active listening and utilize it intentionally and regularly, you will have a better relationship with your spouse and children? I can’t tell you how many times I’m watching TV or working on my computer while my wife is talking to me and then she says, “Greg, tell me what I just said.” I usually struggle to repeat her words back to her. Since I’ve been coached on active listening, I’ve gotten better at this. I’ve still got a way to go, but I’m growing and learning. You’ll find that your parenting skills and dynamics change with your kids if you truly pay attention to them, make eye contact with them, and say back to them, “If I heard you right, you’re feeling…” If you accept my advice and heed my own testimony, this skill can improve and for some of you, save your marriage and/or relationship with your kids.
  5. Relationships: One of the things that I’m proud of is that I’m a good friend. I truly care about those that I’m in a relationship with. When I interact with my friends now, I’m trying my best to actively listen. Too many times we’re quick to interrupt and interject our thoughts without allowing them to finish their thought and express how they feel. If you want to go to the next level in your life and relationships, learn to listen and then respond with grace and love.
  • You know who’s really good at active listening? Coaches and counselors. I think we, as church leaders, could learn a lot from them and apply this same technique to our various areas of ministry and service.
  • These are 5 things that I’m working on in my life and if you prayerfully assess and evaluate your own areas, you’ll have no regrets. Remember: Leaders are listeners. Let’s seek to lead and listen exceedingly well.
  • One last thing, friends and you haven’t heard me say this in YEARS: Go to my YouTube channel and subscribe! I am about to start recording regular content for pastors and leaders. I’ll be doing series for areas and subjects such as leadership in general, pastoral ministry, helps and coaching, guest services training and insights, ministry thoughts, mental health issues and awareness, and other things that I get emailed about. Please SUBSCRIBE today!